Monthly Archives: December 2011

“I hate strip joints”  “Really?  Are you a vegetarian?” Somehow the retort made hilarious sense, as if for some reason being a guy these girls didn’t believe me.  Seriously though I’ve never been into strippers, prostitutes, escorts or anything of that ilk.  Someone once said; “if it isn’t free, it’s not for me.”  That about …

I’m slowly managing to get the body clock right, but it’s taking time.  The only reason is I have to be out of the hostel at 11am because they are fumigating the rooms.  Thank the lord they didn’t do this yesterday. Daylight.  I’ve not really missed you.  I’ve always been nocturnal.  Now I stand, blinking …

“Was she a good ride?”  “Well, no, not really; I was in the driving seat; however when you’re driving that particular vehicle…” A little hilarious guy humour to being this post.  It was funny at the time. I’ve often thought about just how far I would go with this blog of mine. I’m discovering it …

I wake still fully clothed, but surprisingly early.  Today is the day.  It doesn’t take me too long to pack up my three days worth of clothes, pay the final installment of my hostel bill, receive many a ‘humourous’ sarcastic; “ahhh you’re finally leaving” comments and get out of town.  I say my goodbyes to …

Mitch has done a runner for the Costa Rican border by the time I’ve woken up.  Probably a very wise move.  I find myself still here, persuaded to stay at least one more night by a nice bunch of folk and the promise of a massive party in the evening.  Added to this if I …

I wake early, as you would expect, pretty anxious about the nights events.  I’m reluctant to go out anywhere alone, but I wander round to Mitch’s hostel and set up shop.  The story is out, people are concerned, and I’m gaining something of an unwanted (but still pretty cool) reputation. Originally I had planned on …

You’re not going to believe this.  I don’t believe it myself.  Let’s have a look at my track record down here so far; ‘previously; in Stuart’s life’… lost the girl, wallet stolen, glasses taken from face, new card stuck in Managua.  That brings us up to date.  Now lets add ‘bar brawl.’ The day was …

Look I’ve got to be honest here; I have no idea what I did today.  I’m writing a few days behind and if I can’t remember what I did, then I probably didn’t do anything.  You probably didn’t do much either so don’t mutter something under your breath about how I should have got out …

Alright so here we go.  I’ve managed to convince a half English, half Spanish type to come with me on the mission.  Since without a Spanish speaker I would probably never come back alive, Miguel has very kindly (foolishly) offered to help.  We find ourselves on a bus to Managua at 6.45am. Trying to sleep …

Finally a day of action.  Of some kind.  We manage to find out that my parcel is being held by customs and FedEx…because they want to tax the wallet.  A £25 wallet.  I’m at a total loss for words, yet still manage to turn the air blue. So a wonderful day trip to Managua is …