I have a companion to show me Bouzov castle, which is situated around to two hours from Olomouc in the rolling Czech countryside. The castle itself is something out of a Disney movie, with a fairytale feel about it, and indeed a number of films have been made here. It’s easy to see why with the air of magic that encompasses the structure. The tour is in Czech, but combined with my friends translation and an English pamphlet it isn’t a problem. As striking as the castle is on the outside, it’s the inside that is stunningly beautiful. If you’re ever in this neck of the woods I would recommend a visit.
Upon returning to the hostel for some reason I’ve decided to hit the bottle early and we’re all pretty away with it as we flood the pub. My companion from today’s excursion is there with another guy, and she informs me they’re going onto another club. As the drink flows I start to feel like I should turn in, but I take a taxi to try to find her regardless. I don’t receive the warmest of welcomes, and it looks like this is one of those cases where I’m not wanted. I’m drunk enough to concoct some story about what is going on, which means I can storm off in a huff. Somehow I manage to get second wind and bump into hostel friends just in time to experience the night taking a turn for the bizarre.
We’re being yelled at from across the street by a guy dressed as a rag doll. Then two different sets of Czechs are trying to get us to go back to their flats. As tired and as fed up as I am, I find myself staggering along behind, and before long we’re on top of a roof overlooking the Cathedral. The space below is a loft, with exposed beams and mattresses scattered around wooden floorboards. Without warning, our host has donned a priests cassock, and produced a guitar and a mannikin hand. While myself and a friend are climbing up into the rafters, he’s standing at the top of a stepladder slapping the guitar strings with the dummy arm, wailing nonsensical songs. He then lifts his cassock to display a furry thong. Someone produces a 7ft inflatable penis.
In hindsight I figure these guys are professional party legends. I’m convinced they have a massive treasure chest filled with toys, and they just decide to grab a load of folk from a bar (or street), and create a staggeringly unique and random night, the likes of which you have never seen. It’s sheer genius. It’s utter chaos. It’s pure hedonism.
I’m getting the penis pushed into my face up on the beam, while nobody is safe as it is fired around the room and smacked into people’s mouths. As I’m trying to lower myself from the height, I slip, scrape both my arms red raw, and fall. With a perfect ten point landing I smash down perfectly astride the giant cock, with Oskar and co in fits of laughter. I never thought I would say last night a penis saved my life.
Castles and cocks
I have a companion to show me Bouzov castle, which is situated around to two hours from Olomouc in the rolling Czech countryside. The castle itself is something out of a Disney movie, with a fairytale feel about it, and indeed a number of films have been made here. It’s easy to see why with the air of magic that encompasses the structure. The tour is in Czech, but combined with my friends translation and an English pamphlet it isn’t a problem. As striking as the castle is on the outside, it’s the inside that is stunningly beautiful. If you’re ever in this neck of the woods I would recommend a visit.
Upon returning to the hostel for some reason I’ve decided to hit the bottle early and we’re all pretty away with it as we flood the pub. My companion from today’s excursion is there with another guy, and she informs me they’re going onto another club. As the drink flows I start to feel like I should turn in, but I take a taxi to try to find her regardless. I don’t receive the warmest of welcomes, and it looks like this is one of those cases where I’m not wanted. I’m drunk enough to concoct some story about what is going on, which means I can storm off in a huff. Somehow I manage to get second wind and bump into hostel friends just in time to experience the night taking a turn for the bizarre.
We’re being yelled at from across the street by a guy dressed as a rag doll. Then two different sets of Czechs are trying to get us to go back to their flats. As tired and as fed up as I am, I find myself staggering along behind, and before long we’re on top of a roof overlooking the Cathedral. The space below is a loft, with exposed beams and mattresses scattered around wooden floorboards. Without warning, our host has donned a priests cassock, and produced a guitar and a mannikin hand. While myself and a friend are climbing up into the rafters, he’s standing at the top of a stepladder slapping the guitar strings with the dummy arm, wailing nonsensical songs. He then lifts his cassock to display a furry thong. Someone produces a 7ft inflatable penis.
In hindsight I figure these guys are professional party legends. I’m convinced they have a massive treasure chest filled with toys, and they just decide to grab a load of folk from a bar (or street), and create a staggeringly unique and random night, the likes of which you have never seen. It’s sheer genius. It’s utter chaos. It’s pure hedonism.
I’m getting the penis pushed into my face up on the beam, while nobody is safe as it is fired around the room and smacked into people’s mouths. As I’m trying to lower myself from the height, I slip, scrape both my arms red raw, and fall. With a perfect ten point landing I smash down perfectly astride the giant cock, with Oskar and co in fits of laughter. I never thought I would say last night a penis saved my life.